My less than fairy tale wedding

weddingIts wedding season and many of my friends are getting married. It’s a time in my life that I can look back now and laugh at. But at the time of my very own wedding-it was less than something to laugh at.

It was November 3, 2007, the day of my wedding. A year of planning has come up to this very day. I thought I was prepared and you would figure after planning for a year everything would turn out well right? Well not exactly. See I learned your truly are never prepared for that day. So my nightmare began with my hair appointment. I was already running behind, because I went to the hall to make sure everything was being taken care of correctly. Me being the perfectionist, I was scared something would not be set up right. I got back to my grandmother’s house, showered up and prepared to leave, only I noticed I couldn’t. I had lost my keys. Frantically I enlisted the entire household to find my keys and for some reason, they could not be found. Finally my grandma piped up and said go ahead and take my car.  Reluctantly I said okay. See, she had no air conditioning in her car. Even though it was November it was nearing almost 85 degrees that day in Florida. So here I am driving in 85 degree heat, just had a shower and about to get my stuff done, I could just imagine myself melting on the way back!

Once in her car, I look over to notice my beautiful $200.00 veil sitting in the window of my locked car. I could feel the tears run down my face because I needed it for my hair appointment. I gathered my emotions and told myself someone could place it on later. I arrived at my hair appointment running in less than a minute late. I never researched these people but thought it was a high-end place and how could they mess it up? The lady did my hair first and honestly I don’t think she did that bad of a job. It wasn’t until the time she was supposed to put on the make up where things got worse. During the whole time of doing my hair she told me how she was the best at doing make up and all of her friends and family say “please do my makeup” and she went on and on. Once I got into the chair she continued showering herself with compliments ,I just sat there and let her have her way. I told her that I barely wear makeup so please do not put a lot on because I will look unnatural. Well the appointment finished and she showed me what I looked like in the mirror. She was so proud. I saw myself and wanted to cry.

Once I got home I ran into the bathroom near to tears. I looked like a clown. She colored in my eye brows a dark color, put way to much eye shadow and placed dark pencil liner around my lips. I looked like Chinga-a-Bling or some girl from the 90’s. I began to take the makeup off my face and as my sister walked in she could see how bad it was. My nightmare continued when I then received a phone call from my  ex-husband. He said that they delivered the cake to go sign for it at the hall. I ordered the cake at Publix. For anyone that is local, they know Publix has the best cakes and are known for their baked goods. I was excited because I chose the “Breath Taking” Cake which is a four tiered square cake with fresh flowers in between each later, truly breath-taking. When I arrived there, much to my horror ,the cake took my breath away alright! In fact the best way to describe it was a three layer thanksgiving cake. It was covered in all brown and had fallen leaves on it. it had our precious moments cake topper on it. I called my ex-husband and said this needs to be fixed. My brother is the one who fixed it-but that’s a whole another story and blog! The excuse the lady gave was they didn’t have the square plates to make the cake I needed and it would have been too heavy to do the four tiers. You could only imagine my response.

At that point I thought what else could go wrong? I went back home and got my dress on, tried to forget the events leading up to that moment. It was time to leave and we all got in our Limo’s. I was excited for the rest of the evening.  Halfway to the ceremony, I realize that I didn’t have my veil on. With all the mess that was going on, I forgot to look for my keys again and get it. I was upset.  At this point nothing mattered, because I decked out all the limos with gold scholger and we all started drinking.

We pull up to the ceremony and much to my surprise, not only was almost no one there, my family (who had helped me out greatly) was still setting up. I could not believe it and wished I could get out to help. So we drove away to give them time. We drove around for what seemed about 20 minutes. My bridal party was getting drunk at that point. Let’s face it I had a couple too. By the time they were ready, I believe we were all drunk. When we pull up, the first thing I noticed the lack of crowd. We had paid for and received RSVP for 150 people. There were less than 25. To make matters worse. There was only one person who showed up for my ex-husbands side. His brother. It was hard to enjoy my moment with my soon to be husband, because I was dwelling on everything. Once again, I shrugged it off and thought that maybe everyone will be at the reception.

The ceremony was done by my aunt and it was special -it went off perfectly. I think that was the only part of the wedding that went as planned. We loaded back up into the limos and headed to the party. I was excited to let loose and see everyone. But once again, much to dissapointment, the same 25 people who were at the ceremony had showed up to the reception. I was so hurt. I had paid for 150 people, some of them RSVP the day before and still did not show.  Just in time for 6:00 was the cake that arrived that Publix re-did. It was a five tired round cake with bright colors that did not match my wedding colors at all. But at that point, nothing mattered anymore.

A week after the honey moon, I reflected on the wedding. I was upset and hurt by the people who didn’t show. The time and money I spent, that I could have saved. I thought about who I invited. I shut out people who I knew in my heart should have showed, but invited the people who I thought would have showed, or needed to be there. That day, I learned who was truly there for me and who wasn’t. I never researched my hair dresser and because of the mess up with the cake, I had no pictures of it. That day I learned a lot.

So my advice to you is research, have extra car keys, and enlist help. Don’t be afraid to ask for it. Finally, before you invite your neighbor or your 20th cousin down the line, just because you spent some childhood time with them, invite someone who has always truly been there for you. Most of all, enjoy your moment. Between all the chaos I had got lost and forgot the meaning and purpose of the wedding.



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